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Refusing to Climb Mount Backlog (It Doesn't Exist)


On 06/25/2017 at 07:46 PM by Super Step

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We've all heard the tale of Mount Backlog, the mountain of games in our "shame" pile we have yet to get to. We want to experience all the games we bought on whatever sale made us think we were a nerd-Kardashian, prompting an ill-advised shopping spree wherein we told ourselves having $2 isn't near as satisfying as not having $2 and instead having a digital file we will never touch, but are glad we got at such a steal. Then that $2 gets multiplied about ten times or so, and about five of twenty of those digital files will be experienced, roughly three of them enjoyed on some level.

At least, that's been my experience with the advent of digital sales. Used to be I had little disposable income and would finish every game I got, or at least get close. The only Zelda title I own that remains unbeaten is Spirit Tracks and I'm now on a mission not to finish that game. I don't enjoy the ending and haven't at any point I've gone back to try wrapping things up. I don't really feel like playing through it all again, so ... why the hell should I?

The thing is, Mount Backlog is only an obligation if you believe it is. It's a false idol representation of the sunk cost fallacy that makes me enjoy gaming LESS. If I'm being honest with myself, my quality of life would probably improve by NOT trying to 100% games I've stopped enjoying trying to 100%. Maybe I could sell them, but even if I can't turn a profit, isn't continuing to grind at something I've stopped enjoying just diminishing returns? At some point, I lost interest in a game I spent money for. Why would I make the response to that actively disliking a game I bought and wasting time with it I could spend on things I actually enjoy?

I have disposable income now, so I can afford more than the once-in-a-blue-moon purchase and/or every-once-in-a-while rental. This and didgital sales have resulted in my owning more games and having much more variety at my fingertips than ever before, but there's a key thing I forget every time I bite the fish hook of a flash or seasonal sale:

I only have that disposable income in the first place because I have so much less time than I used to. Without getting into specifics, I'm happy to say that $100 purchases really don't hurt me all that much. I was annoyed by forgetting I had AAA when I locked myself out of my car the other day, and I'm certainly not about to pay a locksmith company $119 for something I could have done with the same equipment ever again, but what I experienced was frustration at wasting too much money, not an apocalyptic sense of doom losing that much on a stupid mistake could spell for other people (which is why certain life advice only works if you're middle class and above, but that's a whole other blog for a different website). 

However, even with my summers "off," I'm constantly thinking of lesson plans, working a part-time job and crossing my fingers Betsy DeVos's private company CEO crony doesn't make my loan payments harder than they have to be, while making time for ... things I want to do IN THAT MOMENT.

Now, if I thought my life could be enriched by Yooka-Laylee the same way it could by reading a novel, I might make room for it. It's ok to have some games in the back of your mind you want to get to. I still really want to play BioShock, for example. But if I don't feel like playing BioShock in the next few weeks, then it isn't going to happen. This is because I simply don't have the time to grind at things I don't enjoy anymore.

And no. I am not going to make time for video games when I could fill more time with exercise, guitar, scheduling and other forms of self-improvement. That's not a knock at video games as an art or entertainment medium. I think video games are capable of doing everything other art forms can do, PLUS allow the user control. Heck, there are even clear self and system-improvements to be found in things like VR tech that could make medical training more easy or tell an interactive story that elicits empathy better than any movie could. Even without VR, being in control of a character can be a more powerful experience than simply watching or reading about them, depending how your brain is wired. But at this age and with this little time, I simply am not going to dedicate my time to anything, in any medium, I'm not enjoying unless it leads to a clear improvement in my life. Obsessing over a backlog, for me, does the opposite. 

Hell, it makes the games I'm trying to beat feel more tedious and like more of a slog by default, since at that point I'm trying to finish them before I'm trying to experience them. It was cool to play the episodic content in Life is Strange every week day on the days in which it's set (Mon-Fri), but I stopped being dedicated to making sure I could finish a chapter on the same day when I realized I had work at 4 a.m. the next morning and no game is worth that lack of sleep when you need the rest and have to get up that early. 

Why did I take time out of my day to write this blog? Because I wanted to. Because I need to keep my writing skills somewhat sharp. Because I felt  like it. 

My current plan is to play through Horizon: Zero Dawn before the DLC comes out in the fall. But if I don't feel like it? Then it isn't going to happen. I'm not about to justify a $60 purchase by stealing more time from myself. It's too valuable a resource for me right now. 

Mount Backlog only exists in your head. You can conquer it now by simply not believing in it. 


 

Comments

Matt Snee Staff Writer

06/25/2017 at 07:59 PM

Fight the power! Tongue Out

The thing is about (a good deal) of my backlog, is they are games I do want to play. I'm just busy and distracted by my writing, or whatever project I'm on. I want to play these games. I just don't have the time. But if dabbling is all I can do then that's all I can do.  

With reading, I feel it's part of my job as an author to read, so I read for a couple of hours every day. I enjoy it, but I also feel that I must do it to continually educate myself. I wish I played more games, just like I wished I watched more movies. NOt for any other reason really because I want to. But, like you said, being an adult means you can't always do just what you want to do cause other things come first. 

Super Step Contributing Writer

06/25/2017 at 08:47 PM

I gotta fight da powers that be!

My backlog starts out as a bunch of games I want to play, but then I start trying to either play too many of them or grind through one I don't really feel like playing at the time. 

And I think you made that thing point about being an adult who can't just do everything we want to with limited time more clear than I did in my blog. It could use some editing, since I'm switching between first and second person for what is ultimately a personal experience I'm only assuming other people have. I wrote it in part because I feel I need to write more. I wanted to just get it out there, so it's pretty rough, I'm sure. There are probably some tense changes in there that are out of place ...

But that's just it: if you enjoy the experience of something meant purely as entertainment, it's worth it. But I feel books and games especially can lead us to believe our unfinished entertainment pursuits are moral failings, and that's where I'm starting to see the error of my grindy, sunk-cost-fallacy ways. 

Super Step Contributing Writer

06/25/2017 at 09:47 PM

I also should have worked paradox of choice and/or analysis paralysis in here somehow. Hmmm ...

Matt Snee Staff Writer

06/25/2017 at 09:58 PM

well it's the old story - when you're an adult you can eat candy whenever you want. But you won't.  

Super Step Contributing Writer

06/25/2017 at 10:51 PM

My anti-reflux diet calls buckshot. 

KnightDriver

06/25/2017 at 11:46 PM

I believe in a thing called backloggery.

I sit like a dragon on my pile of virtual and real games and watch for any theif who would dare steal a single one of them. Then I go into a dragon sleep that is actually a deep meditation where I learn the workings of the universe in preparation for the test that, if won, will raise me to dragon lord status. 

I believe some sort of demon metaphor would also work in this context. 

Super Step Contributing Writer

06/26/2017 at 08:16 PM

Or demonic dragon. 

KnightDriver

06/26/2017 at 11:12 PM

Dragons are kind of naturally demonic. How much worse can they get? I remember a dragon zombie from the game Wizardry. That looked like what I would want a dragon demon to look like. 

dragonzombie

Machocruz

06/26/2017 at 12:18 PM

Another things is when you buy something you are buying based on the assumption that you will enjoy the thing, either because it looked interesting, spoke to your mind, or because it received a lot of praise, or a number of other reason. You are purchasing potential. And sometimes the actual experience of the thing either doesn't live up to the image you created of it, or isn't satisfying in some other way.

And let's face it, 10+ hours is a lot to spend on one single, continuous entertainment. WE don't always make it to the end. Some games, books, or Tv shows peak out eariler than they end, so that the rest is diminishing returns.

Super Step Contributing Writer

06/26/2017 at 08:16 PM

Agreed.

asrealasitgets

06/26/2017 at 04:07 PM

I don't have a game backlog. I only play what I want when I feel like it. If a game doesn't grab me early on then I'll drop it, just as with books, comics, TV, etc. And actually, because games are so cheap it gives me a chance to discover new genres I might have put off before, so I welcome sales. Most of the games I buy in sales tend to be games I'm already familiar with, but didn't get a chance to buy on launch. 

Videogames are my favorite media. I don't think tv, books or film can do exactly what a game does for me. I might have been a bit whiny about TLOU earlier, but I felt immersed in the world where I felt a lot of stress throughout the entire playthrough, which I think was the point. I'm playing through the METRO sequel on PS4 and the atmosphere and world is amazingly dark. I just got kidnapped by a group of nazis and now Im infiltrating their base to save a friend that saved me from execution. There are both stealth and combat elements, but the game has me hooked. I dont think a TV show can quite recreate these feelings, aside from jump scares in thrillers, or feeling empathy in torture scenes. I read the books, the game is very gamey, but I appreciate being able to play in the world. 

Super Step Contributing Writer

06/26/2017 at 08:21 PM

I'm not knocking sales, especially the ones that have games I already want. I'm knocking my dumb, knee-jerk response to them. 

I don't necessarily experience most media of any sort beyond entertainment, unless it's a very specific, gripping work. I still felt I was in a game in TLoU, but REVII nearly gave me a heart attack in a way movies just can't do. But then, nothing can get me inside a character's head as well as a book, and movies/TV have been my favorite visual medium for a while. They're great because they are easy to experience, but sometimes cause you to think about hard subjects. 

Basically, I really don't see any medium as "better" than another, but different with different strengths. Honestly, if there's one medium that speaks to me more than any other, it's music, which I realize is part of most of those other mediums. 

goaztecs

07/06/2017 at 12:59 AM

I used to think that Mount Backlog was something I had to fix, to justify buying the games in my library. I would play some really bad Playstation games (Hello 007 Racing) but after a year or two I realized I wouldn't get to the point where I could say I've beaten everything. After this, playing games became a lot more fun, and when the whole concept of trophies came about I would try to unlock some of them but they weren't a big deal. Hell because of the trophy system I started playing GTA games without codes. Now it feels odd to play those games with them (unless its a PC mod then hell freaking yeah!)

Going back to the actual topic I like saying "taking a game off Mount Backlog" because now it kind of feels like a game, an added bonus to finishing a game. Will I ever finish all my games? Probably not, there are a ton of really bad games I have on the old iPod, and Android, as well as a bunch on classic plastic, but it doesn't bother me. I'll still play some random freemium games on the iPad mixed in with whatever I'm playing on the laptop. Besides one of the games I play a lot of is an endless runner of a dug wearing a sombrero. Easily the best use of a $1. 

Super Step Contributing Writer

07/06/2017 at 01:07 AM

Does that endless runner involve pugs? May have shared that with a pug-owning half-Mexican friend recently. Lol 

I wouldn't consider any cell phone games a part of my backlog, to be honest. For me to want to finish a game, it has to be AAA or at least AA and have some form of narrative clearly marking a beginning and end outside of trophy hunts. 

I think we came to the realization about mount backlog just not being fun though. I can be a completionist, and I got to a point where I was basically sucking time out of my life trying to juggle too many games. Plus, spending too much money on games I may never be in the mood to play. 

Having said that, now I'm trying to force myself to focus on Horizon so I don't lose track of it, so perhaps I'm a hypocrite. Lol

goaztecs

07/12/2017 at 11:54 AM

Yep Turbo Pug! One of the random Steam bundles I bought had what I think was the entire franchise. I think there is also one where the pug is in space and its a shooter. I'll try it out at some point. Some of the early iPod/Android games are full games, and of course some of the Humble Bundle games I bought for Android are full titles. The freemium games I stopped counting because there is no way people can complete those things without sinking tons of money or having a rooted device.

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