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I'm Playing Mortal Kombat - Finally.


On 06/10/2013 at 09:59 AM by Blake Turner

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As you might know, I am Australian. That means that for the longest time, free thinking adults have been unable to view things they are allowed to view on free to air television in a game they paid $100 for. Oh, and games cost more than houses here. Which, I might add, is stupid. I mean we have free health care and an education system that actually works (take that USA) yet a grown man can't decide what content he can consume? When the fuck did we become China?

 Anyway, that's been changed. We have an R rating here for video games now, and Mortal Kombat is the first game that was previously banned to be allowed into the country. I've played it, and I'm very, VERY confused as to why this game was denied entry in the first place. I mean, we've had all of the God of War's. We've had all of the Dead Space's. We've had Fallout 3. HOW THE FUCK IS THIS GAME WORSE?! I mean the worst fatality I've seen is Noob's, where he rips the person in half (looking particularly nasty when done to a female, might I add). This is NOTHING compared to some games I've played! This is nothing compared to THE FUCKING BIBLE! Have you read that book? Go read the book of Judges, where a fat dude gets stabbed with a sword, and it describes the fat oozing out. Yet we read this shit to CHILDREN!

 What I guess I'm saying is that this game is a massive let down. And that Christianity is stupid. But mainly that this game is a letdown. I mean it's a great game, but I was expecting to be shocked. I was expecting to be mortified. I was expecting to actually see a reason behind the banning of this game. What I got was a game that's tame when compared to an Eminem song.


 

Comments

Super Step Contributing Writer

06/10/2013 at 09:15 PM

I'm gonna stay away from the U.S. and Christian bashing, and just point out that an Australian Freshman that lived in one of the dorms I worked in my senior year said he was not aware of Australians missing out on any games due to censorship when I asked him about a GTA being embargoed. That lying ... wonderful bastard that gave me free hot peppers last time I visited my alma mater, cause he was working the Jimmy Johns there. Still a liar, though. A delicious, hot pepper providing liar.

My U.S. education tells me that last comma placement is suspect and possibly makes what I wrote homosexual. I'm leaving it there, not cause I'm homosexual, but because I feel very strongly about hot peppers.

Chunopo

06/10/2013 at 11:12 PM

I Concur, Hot peppers and Chilli's rule.... except when they are ejected!

Blake Turner Staff Writer

06/11/2013 at 02:27 AM

Mmm... delicious Aussies... gotta love em.

BrokenH

06/10/2013 at 11:17 PM

There's corpse fucking in the hidden Krypt areas. You also eat babies when beating story mode with Shao Kahn! No,not really. Sorry if I got your hopes up,mate. lol.

But yeah, MK's violence is the comical over the top juvenile variety. If God Of War equates to "Game Of Thrones" MK is more like "Army Of Darkness".

Blake Turner Staff Writer

06/11/2013 at 02:28 AM

 Yes. Actually that's true after actually seeing the "Red Wedding" on screen. I read the book and I was still shocked when it happened lol.

Chunopo

06/10/2013 at 11:18 PM

I'm worried about my gaming life here in Aus now, though the R18 gives me hope, I was gutted to see that State of Decay was delayed, though I cheekily paid for it via my PC so a download was started automatically when I turned my X Box on. One more point, taken literally I can certainly see how the bible can seem very far fetached but underneith the stories lies some good common sense and in many cases principles that many kind and honest people would agree with. I'll stop there though before it sounds like I'm going to start singing Kumbaya on your blog!

Blake Turner Staff Writer

06/11/2013 at 02:26 AM

Yes. "Stone a woman to death if you rape her and she refuses to marry you." Brilliant moral there. "If you love your (I'll just say family to save time) more than me, you are not worthy of me." What lesson does that provide, other than Jesus is a colossal dick. Sorry, I just had an argument with my dad about this, so I'm even more hating of christianity than usual.

Chunopo

06/11/2013 at 10:59 PM

I love the film Shawshank redemption (sorry but I'm going to use an obscure context here), for me the film is one about hope even in the most difficult of circumstances but it has scenes of Rape, revenge, brutality and out of this comes something rather special, a moral to the story which I find rather inspiring. Someone else who watches the same film however might have a very different interpretation, find nothing but horror and disgust and feel they can't escape witnessing the 'depravity' of human nature. Same film, two very different view points. Thats how I view the bible, it's a tool ment to help guide people to God. That tool might not work for some (I myself have not yet really read the bible, however I found God in other areas of my life, namely my experiences) but that tool will work for someone else. I suppose my point is that Christianity is a tool for understanding what happens after we die (assuming you believe there is something else of course) and that this particular tool might not work for you, but does work for someone else. I'm not saying of course that extremism can't be bread from the bible but then I believe that extremism can be birthed from pretty much anything. It's about the open mind of the reader rather than the text it's self.

Blake Turner Staff Writer

06/12/2013 at 05:50 AM

I'm all good with what you believe. I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness, and my dad constantly tries to shove his values down my throat which makes me very quick to side against it. Sorry if I offended you.

 While I do see what you're saying, the thing about rape was a law in the bible. If a woman is raped, and doesn't marry the man that raped her, she is to be stoned to death. Just interested to see what you think of that.

Chunopo

06/12/2013 at 06:30 AM

No offence taken dude, I enjoy some mental stimulation with fully rounded folk like your self! as for the rape thing, thats fucked up. I'm a big believer that any text written by man is deeply effected by several social factors such as the time it was written and what social norms included. The bible was written a couple of thousand years ago so I don't really understand why certain individuals hang on its every word, I think the deepest faith you can find are those that question what they are told and don't fall on the argument 'thats what the bible says'. My gran is a classic example, don't believe in Jesus Christ (as a guy with a beard who performed miracles) then you don't get into 'heaven'. I think ones of the best decriptions I ever read on anything like this was E. H. Gombrich in his book 'the story of art'. He talks about why certain people don't like Picasso or Monet paintings and he says something along the lines of it offends their reality. For them the grass has to be green and the sky has to be blue, they can't/ won't even imagine it any other way. The best description I ever heard about religion on the other hand was a woman who described her near death experience. She likened god to a diamond and said that all the religions of the world were like the points on that diamond, they all needed to exist for the diamond to be there. I only know one thing for sure, given the size of our universe something is out there, ironically many hardcore religious people (maybe you dad too if you don't mind me saying) are the most scared. They have to cling onto very old and in some cases outdated texts to make sense of it all but at the end of the day nothing teaches you a lesson like life. Sorry for going on, I just enjoy these kind of discussions and thanks for asking my opinion on it!

Blake Turner Staff Writer

06/12/2013 at 06:49 AM

No man that's fine. My biggest contention with Christianity is that a lot of people say that you HAVE to believe in Christ to go to heaven. IMO that's bullshit. If God is as loving as people say he is, he wouldn't be a self centered cock like that. I mean what if you're born in the wrong country? Not every country has as high a christian population as the states? I guess god doesn't like Asians then. What a cock. So I agree with what you're saying about the diamond thing. That makes sense.

 Also... if people actually read the bible as opposed to twisting it, they'd realise that hating on homosexuals is wrong. Jesus came in with a new set of rules in the new testament, and said that those rules made the older ones obsolete. He didn't mention homosexuality once. Therefore, if you eat bacon, or shit in a toilet, yet you hate homosexuals outright, you're going to hell dickhead.

Chunopo

06/12/2013 at 08:02 PM

Totally agree about the country thing, thats what I find laughable with some folk, why should someone born under the Hindu faith have less claim than a Christian! It's not their fault they were concieved in India. And man love isn't wrong......... unless it's performed on me!

Blake Turner Staff Writer

06/12/2013 at 08:04 PM

"It's just guy love..."

SanAndreas

06/11/2013 at 02:34 AM

Mortal Kombat was, incidentally, the game that broke down a lot of American censorship barriers back in the 1990s.

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