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The pit: Creation and the fall that follows.


On 11/15/2013 at 08:22 PM by BrokenH

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As you know, I’ve just gotten done being “in the pit”. Anytime you take a risk to make something  certain people may think “you’re laying open your soul” and every flaw in your song, book, or game is a metaphorical or literal “black mark” upon your reputation as a human being!

That’s my biggest problem. The fact you make something and are judged by it even though it’s a work of fiction. Between us I know you didn’t rob your neighbors, cause the genocide of an entire race, or kidnap your best friend’s little sister! Yet there are people out there who will think you want to do these things or perhaps have done these things because it’s in the yarn you are spinning.

Gutterdelve has become my burden. As my first ever game it gets controversy wherever it goes. Admittedly some of the criticism I receive is good. Some of the replies are very insightful. But often enough I feel as if people partaking my game are looking down on me from their hover discus chairs in the sky whilst telling me either I did something “wrong” or that I’m contributing to a misogynistic sexist sub culture hell bent on keeping women down.

I have never claimed to know the minds of women intimately. I’ve been single and celibate most of my life  and I don’t have the honor of admitting that because I’m trying to “stay pure”. Offline my social skills are almost nonexistent. To clarify, I can nod at someone and smile at them as they walk by. I can even be nice to the check out personnel at my local grocery store. But if you tried to include me in a group or start a conversation with me you would notice how awkward I truly am. Many of these things I enjoy are not mainstream and the life I’ve lived has not always been “safe” and “pleasant”.

What I can say for certain is the mere thought of hurting a woman or even frightening one makes me upset. I would not wish ill-will even upon my online ex-girlfriends. (All three of them, heh!) Because of this it “hurts” to be called misogynistic and it “hurts” when someone accuses me of objectifying women.

Imagine just for a moment you are a single heterosexual male. In this scenario you have met some wonderful people online and you have one best friend who pretty much sees you everyday in real life. Imagine you are also an artist and your subject matter happens to be “sexy females”. (At least most of the time)

Now consider which of these choices is more feasible than the other!

A. I draw scantily clad sexy women in provocative positions because I see them as objects and they’re only good for sex! By the way, I’m anti choice, anti equality, and I secretly hate women as a collective! Long live the patriarchy, boo yah!

B. I draw sexy females because I’m lonely and still have the biological cravings of a healthy straight male. I believe women should have free will, free choice, and they should be given the same respect they give onto me in turn. If kinky sex is offered I might jump at the opportunity but I’d never initiate sexual relations by force on the basis I do in fact have a conscience! I also possess the rationality to realize the women I draw are not “real people” that can be objectified in the first place!

I don’t know about you, but I feel shackled by all these moral crusader thought police. It’s gotten to the point many us dread saying something over the phobia we might offend someone else. Yet if we cannot express certain things or create certain things is that not censorship?

For those “offended”

If you do not like a movie, song, or game why do you interact with it KNOWING it’ll upset you? Are you stupid or just illiterate? After all, warning labels and disclaimers are put on almost everything these days. You don’t go into GTA 5 expecting it to be Shakespeare or an overly positive representation of  humankind in general and you certainly do not go into Dead Or Alive 5 looking for an undercurrent of pro-feminist grandstanding. You might as well stick your hand into the fire under the asinine assumption it will not burn you!


For those interested

After complaints about “random encounters” I devised a new system to eliminate that. You can now get into fights at your leisure. So far the only bug is visible opponents on screen “stand still” when they re-spawn 500 frames later.

I know most of you are tired of updates and revisions but I figured I’d offer this version to people who haven’t played it yet.

Just be sure to heed the warning at the beginning of my game and take it seriously! It goes to some pretty dark places and doesn’t always skimp out on the disturbing details. It’s 100% okay to simply admit “This ain’t my kind of tea, chief! Gonna have to take a rain check!’.

http://www.mediafire.com/download/ndzymwnb7nv16fy/Project3.zip



 

Comments

Matt Snee Staff Writer

11/16/2013 at 09:05 AM

aaaaand we're back.  Phew!

yeah, putting yourself out there is fucked up, I know all about it.  When I used to go onstage with the band, or when I release music, or when I post of publish stuff....  it's a mixed bag.  But it's still worth it.  

I'm very glad you made your game and got out there with it.  Sure, there's been some negativity, but i think for the most part what you've done is amazing.  IT's hard to put yourself out there with art you make, and I really respect people who do it.  

Now... when's that next game coming?  Tongue Out

BrokenH

11/16/2013 at 10:43 AM

As discouraged as I am there probably will be a next game,Matt. The sequel might go into Liam finding out more about his past. As you know, he's kind of like a latino Super-man in the sense he's not truly human and spent time within a crystal in suspended animation. The only reason he took on latino mannerisms is because that's the etnicality he most resembles. Before he found out he was "not human" he probably assumed he originally came from a poor hispanic family whom gave him up for adoption.

There might be a few spin off games too. Right now though? Ugh, I feel beat!

Matt Snee Staff Writer

11/16/2013 at 10:53 AM

yeah, I can understand that.  Making a game can take a lot out of you.  

I actually came up with a great game idea last night, about a villain who travels back in time to kill a boy Jesus before his ministry.  The player will control a time traveller hero who will fight the villain (and his Archon robots), as well as a young Jesus and a (slightly older) Mary Magdalene, as well as a sorceror John the Baptist, etc.  The game would take place in Nazareth, journey to Rome, and then finally back to the future.  

I'm quite obsessed with it.  I've been thinking of game ideas for RPGmaker for the past couple months and I finally came up with one that's feasible... if a bit controversial.  

BrokenH

11/16/2013 at 11:11 AM

Someone I liked once said "If you always please everyone you're playing it too safe within the lines. Good art & literature that is remembered hundreds of years later often rocks the boat!" For the most part that is true. I 'm not saying everyone should resort to "shock value" but I believe if you are passionate enough about a good story you should tell it even if it might offend some people. In other words,go for it,Matt!

Alex-C25

11/16/2013 at 12:55 PM

Just for curiosity, how much notoriety outside of Pixlbit has your game, both positive and negative?

BrokenH

11/16/2013 at 02:47 PM

Many people took offense to the basic concept art and didn't even bother to download. Secondly, one main character's story arch deals with sexual abuse which of course is a touchy issue with a lot of folks. (And admittedly there's a memory sequence that goes into rather vivid detail in the game)

At RMN Gutterdelve probably has an infamous noterity. (Just over 400 downloads) People will probably put it on some kind of snarky "Worst game list" or a "Most offensive game list".

In my defense I never "glorified" rape and I tried to make it obvious it's difficult for someone to move on with their lives after it happens to them.

Personally it's my hypothesis I'm dealing with "popular culture backlash". America is very "PC" and leftist to the point that if you try to make a story with a bit more "bite" it can potentially offend a large crowd.

I'm not ashamed of my game but yeah, maybe I would have done some things a tad differently. I thought about cutting out a big portion of Deidre's "memory sequence" in the HS level but then I thought to myself "Why is this so risque when other games have violent killing,sex mini games, and even depraved torture?". As such, I made a stand and kept that content unaltered. If books and certain movies can get away with the same amount of detail I don't see why I should have to "put up and shut up".

Don't worry Alejandro,if you have doubts don't download. lol. I confess my game is not for everyone.

KnightDriver

11/16/2013 at 04:21 PM

I like "looking down on me from their hover discus chairs in the sky". It makes me think of this from Wall-E:

 walle

BrokenH

11/16/2013 at 04:25 PM

Wall-E was a great film! And thanks for the hover chair reference,Knight. Made me laugh. lol.

Cary Woodham

11/16/2013 at 05:26 PM

Hi Ben.  I like Calvin and Hobbes (your first picture up there). :)

Hopefully I'll have a new blog up by the end of the weekend for you to read.

BrokenH

11/16/2013 at 06:20 PM

That's good,Cary! Yeah, Calvin and Hobbes in one of my favorote strips!

Blake Turner Staff Writer

11/18/2013 at 02:42 AM

 Hurting women makes you uneasy? Man up Ben, these feminists want equality. Punch the cunts in the face if they piss you off, just like you'd do to a man. Equality!

BrokenH

11/18/2013 at 03:56 PM

I want a t-shirt that says "Cunt punching is equality!". You inspire the best ideas Blake! I'd take 1 of you over 100 peeps from Kotaku or Jezebel! Tongue Out

Blake Turner Staff Writer

11/19/2013 at 01:07 AM

That would be awesome lol. And thanks man. I'd take you anyday ;)

BrokenH

11/20/2013 at 06:19 PM

It's cuz I'm so pretteh! But why can't you love me for what's on the inside,bro?!

Blake Turner Staff Writer

11/20/2013 at 06:48 PM

I do love what's inside of you. Hell, inside you is where I want to be, that's how much I love what's inside of you.

BrokenH

11/20/2013 at 07:07 PM

Flattery gets you "everywhere",Blake! Wink 

NSonic79

11/19/2013 at 01:26 PM

It comes with the terriorty these days. it don't matter if your good at what you do or no. Look what happened to Geroge Lucus. He was reveresed with Star Wars IV-VI but reviled after I-III

Just got to learn that it comes with the terrirotry of creation. I'm sure others that started out had te same thing. be it with any type of style the choose. Look what happened to "Fifty Shades of Grey". That book is terrible and it was trashed, yet the author doesn't care for they are getting boatloads of money. I guess you just need to see what makes you happen after you create something and release it for the world to see. Good or bad or real bad, the words will be said. Perhaps you need to do a "press release' explaining your creation on how and why you do it if the need to explain yourself is that strong.

I didn't bother with that when I wrote stories in high school that consisted of a digital musicl player that allowed you to have a protectife bubble, allowing you to gun down anyone without the police being able to touch you.

BrokenH

11/20/2013 at 06:25 PM

On RMN I had a whole page explaining the game. I also warned people it covered controversial themes. However, I think the game would have done better without me showcasing the concept art,NSonic. The "sexy art" of Amy,ANGI,Kara,and Deidre caused a lot of negative publicity and from then on I simply couldn't pitch a proper spin.

But I'm still not "ashamed" of that art. It's not as if I'm the only character designer guilty of fan-service so I still think a lot of people over there were being over reactionary whiney twats! (Pardon my french. lol.)

Regardless,life goes on. I'll make other games in the future and if people have a problem at least now I'm toughened to the point I'll expect it and let it roll off my back.

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