PixlBit

This year, I had my Golden Birthday. I turned 23 on March 23, 2013. At first, it seemed like anything but golden, but the pain in the ass that was this year ultimately made me a stronger person. Here are 23 things I will remember about 2013, some more important than others, all tying into a central theme relating to a certain video game I played recently that has inspired me a great deal. Hope you enjoy!

1. The Mormons Might Be Right … Knock on Wood

Not Pictured: Orgy-Worthy Sex Goddess Mormons I Saw

The first thing I remember about this year was feeling real hopeful about my future, because I was getting called into the freelance job I had gotten at the end of the previous year on a seemingly more regular basis. It was a job in the field I had graduated in, Magna Cum Laude, from my unviersity the previous Spring. Well, it was a job related to visual media anyway, which was good enough for me, even if my role in it was to be a lowly Production Assistant, aka Fetch-Monkey. I loved the people I worked for and with, and they all seemed to like me, and one guy at the top particularly so. He was the one who pushed for me to get more hours, and who usually called me in.

However, the hopeful feeling didn't last too long, as a couple months went by with no calls, despite the fact I was told I'd be called in regularly. This forced me to start the job search again.

It's Actually True; I've Done Research On It; My Fetch-Monkey Job Meant Something, Dammit!

Long story short, I applied to jobs, went to job fairs, and tried to network whenever the opportunity came up to no avail. That is until I landed a summer job off Craigslist, going door-to-door for a pest-control company. I quit after a day, despite making two sales, because my anxiety was not having any of being stuck in a distant location just about literally all day to get God knows who it could be to come out and yell “get the fuck off my porch!” I think I could have handled it under different circumstances, though. Let me explain.

The people I worked with all seemed like they had just been birthed from the Fountain of Youth, because they all looked smoking fucking hot. I mean, I've never considered an orgy before, but even with the guys there, I would have been down to drop trou were one proposed, because hot damn! The way they seemed to act before I talked to them was very fratty to me, which made me nervous about fitting in, but they wound up being the nicest people I've ever met. Plus their physical shape and the fact they did that job certainly said a lot about their work ethic.

As it turns out, the reason they were like this is because; based on the evidence I saw; South Park was right, and Mormonism is absolutely the correct religion. Yup, Brigham Young had brought 'em young from the Fountain, and I discovered they were mostly people from out of state who attended BYU, but came to Dallas to live in apartments with each other and do this job to earn a good summer wage.

Seriously, though, this episode was incredibly accurate

Now, I did not quit because they were Mormon. I'm glad I got to experience a culture different from my own, and as I said, they were not only good looking, but pretty much the best of people and very supportive. The problem was, I'm an agnostic with a sailor mouth, and you could tell I wasn't exactly going to fit in. I tried to tone it down, and were it not for the fact I hated the job itself, probably would have just worked at it. But anxiety, social difference, and job hate are not a mix I'm willing to put up with for three months, which is why I decided not to sign that contract and got two interviews within the week, after sending some applications to other places immediately after I quit.

Both interviews seemed to go very well, but I decided on one over the other and I think you can all guess what happened there. I was unemployed for most of the year until deciding to go back to school, which … I'll get to.

I also technically freelanced for Blue Dog Business Services ... I better not need to put that $0 on my tax return. I probably do, though. Fuck you, IRS!

You can call me a quitter, but I'd say I just know my limits and what I want. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective...

2. 1up Went Down … Get It?

I posted this to make you sad.

Oh yeah, and well before I got the door-to-door job; while I was making over $500 one week working ridiculous hours at the PA job, in fact; 1up closed its doors … kind of. Turns out, we all freaked out a bit more than necessary, since its servers are up and running indefinitely.

If you all remember, people were trying to find out where we all could go and be a community again, all that jazz. I was on the 1up Facebook, so I told people to go there and I'd invite them to join. I also noticed this here Pixlbit site was becoming pretty popular among 1up “refugees,” and started promoting it pretty heavily as the new place to go, by posting any new blogs of mine from Pixlbit as links on the 1up Facebook Group page. This did not go over well with one person in particular, who found these posts obnoxious and an affront to the 1up community, and others found them obnoxious as well. So I stopped, once I became aware of how everyone felt.

Pictured above: a torture device for those with online Asperger's. Oh, it's a thing.

You could say I'm an obnoxious bastard, but all I was trying to do was reunite a particular old community, not destroy a different old community. That wasn't how people perceived it, though.

On the other hand, people didn't perceive 1up's dissolution in a very positive light, and I'm not saying it was a good thing, but it did lead to the strength of this community now. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective ...

This ... is a really appropriate design for the game I'm centering this blog around

3. Macklemore's Heist of My Heart … Wait, That Sounds Gay/Golden Birthday

My Golden Birthday was this year, as I turned 23 on March 23. My only requests were for my family and I to eat at Grimaldi's, my favorite pizza place and probable holding cell of the real-life Triforce (I'm just saying, for pizza to be that good, that magic triangle of triangles is in that brick oven somewhere) and for Macklemore's CD, The Heist. My other request for my cat, Clinger, to come back to life was forfeited when I realized I had been the one to put him to sleep, so that one was kind of on me. I guess his pain ending was good gift. At least his death was the Friday before St. Patrick's Day, so we all had had an excuse to drink.

R.I.P. Buddy

Anyway, I had initially written Macklemore off as a goofy pop act who'd be irrelevant within a week, having been exposed to him for the first time through a FineBrothers video about “Thrift Shop.” I later came to appreciate both the music and message of that song and its artist.

"Dookie brown leather slippers that I found digging." A true testament to the power of perserverance. One not matched since Gone with the Wind hit theaters. 

Sure, it lost a lot of its charm after the “Boulevard of Broken Dreams” level of broken record radio play it received, but that exposure to the song got me to really listen to and like it, and a review by the Rap Critic got me to understand that there was way more to this guy than stale R. Kelly jokes.

Y'know, I hate to admit it, but I can see where that speculation about his sexuality comes in ...

In fact, his story and his music, which overall was way different from his initial hit, became an inspiring symbol for me, my Rocky, so to speak. Well, ok, Cinderella Man is my Rocky, since it's also an underdog boxing movie and my favorite of all time, but that's beside the point. Here was a cracka-ass, doofy-haired rapper whose surface appearance belied the depth of his true nature. Not only did his rap themes directly oppose the mainstream rap ideology, promoting ideas like “saving money is tight yo, and 'dem homos is aigh't,” but he got to where he was by staying true to himself and doing things his own way, soliciting Warner Bros. for radio promotion and remaining independent otherwise. The songs “Make the Money” and “Jimmy Iovine” are great at expressing the sentiment of hard work and independence paying off. As a drug addict, Mr. Ben Haggerty (“Professor” Macklemore's real name) knows a lot about the important of independence, and songs inspired by his struggle for it, like “Neon Cathedral” and the pre-Heist “Otherside” are evidence of his turning a negative into a positive for him.

If "Thrift Shop" is his radio hit, "Otherside" is his indie hit.

As old and obvious as the message of “hang in there, kitty, and stay true to yourself” may be, I really needed to hear it this year, and I'm glad Macklemore delivered that message to me. If what could easily have been the next Vanilla Ice could become one of the most powerful musical institutions of 2013, my sorry unemployed ass could follow my dreams as well. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

4. Vlogging … Something that starts with V

I might have been unemployed most of the year, but to my credit, I did not squander my time. Why, I watched shitloads of Netflix, in fact. Anyway, although the quality of my vlogs was crap, it was a good way for me to get back in the habit of talking on camera again, for what it was worth. Also, I saw a really cool French movie called The Intouchables because of it. It was predictable and French, but good nonetheless.

There's my double chin. Was wondering where it went. 

I'm most proud of my sleepy drunk blog of Saved!, though. I realize Santa will shit down my chimney for posting a video where I swear a lot about a movie that's not in line with the teachings of White Conservative Jesus, which is the ONLY Jesus Santa Claus recognizes as the real one (and we will get to the thing I just referenced at the bottom of this list), but y'know, it was worth it. I've always wondered if Santa's poop smells like peppermint, and now I'll get to find out. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

5. Mental Breakdown (M.B.) in Mass Communications

And now we come to the most important part of 2013 for me: my first semester of graduate school. 2013 was a succession of swift kicks to my ego's nut sack, but this was the hardest of those kicks by far. I cried. Like a bitch. Several times. Fetal position.

Come to think of it, my core does feel stronger

It felt great to be back, initially. Mostly, my classes were reading and discussion. The reading was far more than I'd ever done before, but I could handle it, and discussions were pretty much the way I socialized during the week, when I wasn't holed up in my office in the radio station (*cough* ksauradio.com *cough*).

Then came the mid-terms, and the start of writing the research papers. This is where I began severely doubting myself and growing extremely anxious, reaching out for support from whoever would listen to my uber-white version of plight, namely my mom and a friend who had gone through a similar mental breakdown his previous semester, as well as, possibly most importantly, a university counselor.

I realize now that a lot of my mental turmoil was self-inflicted; I needed to change my perspective to counteract my self-doubt and lack of confidence. I learned this partly by just knowing it all along, but also by having it really put in front of me with therapy, which I took advantage of every week, since it's free to university students. I even got some happy pills out of the deal. I know people have different reactions, but for me, they are AWESOME. Like, one of the side effects of these was not being able to ejaculate, and I didn't even care awesome. That's pretty fucking awesome. I'm sorry for relaying that to you, but you need to understand how awesome these pills are.

I know. But trust me. It's for the greater good. 

Of course, they're not magic, even if their physical effect on me indicates they're not placebos, either. You have to have the right mentality on top of having the proper balance between your sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems, and I ultimately do now.

I could easily remind myself how much more other people go through without freaking out about it to that extent, and label myself a pussy. Instead, I have decided it was a learning experience that showed me I am capable of more, and I am so glad to have received that metaphorical kick in the dick. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

6. You're A Real Arrogant Bitch, Korra Brown

And now that we've got most of the depressing crap out of the way, let's talk about television, and awkwardly try and pretend your uncle Joey didn't just tell you about his prostate troubles.

I'm a big fan of the Avatar series, and this year's season started off really good, immediately bringing back the charm and wit I felt was somewhat missing from the first season of Legend of Korra, and introducing one of my favorite characters, Veruck, who Doug Walker (Nostalgia Critic) accurately described in his reviews of this season as “The Artist Formerly Known As Howard Hughes.” I love eccentric side characters who provide comedic relief more than any other character type when it comes to television shows. I used to watch Sabrina the Teenage Witch specifically for Salem the cat, and tune out whatever the hell the main plot was on TGIF Fridays home from school. Not only was Veruck and his dead-eyed assistant hilarious, but there was more focus on Bolin this season, which is good, considering how bland the other characters can sometimes be.

"Sorry bro, this is the fun-vee, the hum drum-vee is over there (with Mako/Korra)"

Then the middle part of the season just got weird. I don't know if this was a problem because male writers were trying to address certain teenage female “issues” without directly referencing them in a kid's show, but Korra became a fairly irrational raging bitch as the season went on. Lin Bei Fong became incredibly stupid, siding with obviously corrupt cops in her department over the obviously more competent Mako. These characters were believably strong and intelligent the season before. Korra had her problems, but not to this extent, and Lin Bei Fong was much more intelligent. It was just odd.

But for realsies, why?

Of course, maybe all this happened because the central focus of the show was the rise of dark spirits, so maybe the characters were all being brainwashed by spirit-badgers or something. Speaking of that premise, two of the series' strongest episodes resulted from this season, with “Beginnings Part 1 and 2,” an Aladdin rip-off explaining the origins of the Avatar in a neat Japanese woodblock-esque art style.

This guy I like

Ultimately, the series redeemed itself for me with its closing message about the importance of self-identity. In a lot of ways, the quality of this season mirrored my year, with the beginning being promising, the middle being really off, but the ending at least evening it all out. Even though it wasn't as good as season 1, it provided the message I needed at the right time, so it was a more important season for me. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective ...

7. Wait, So Death Is Like A Super-Long Nap? Where's a Bus?!

I also caught the first three seasons of Louie on Netflix this year. One episode in particular stands out to me, when Doug Stanhope, playing “Eddie,” decides to give one last goodbye to Louie before he kills himself.

This might hit a bit close to home for some ...

What stood out to me is how angry Louie got at “Eddie” for even considering the idea. He says something to the effect of “life is bigger than you.” It's “[not something you possess, but something you take part in, witness.]” What disturbed me is how I wasn't really on Louie's side when first watching it. I saw the logic in what Stanhope was saying, why go on if everything is just pointless and shitty? That's a sentiment Stanhope has expressed in his stand up, when noting the simultaneously high rates of self-reported happiness and suicide in Finland, explaining that those seemingly contrary statistics make sense, cause they're all perfectly happy, they just check out when they feel like they're done. I wasn't suicidal, but I wasn't mad at Eddie, by any means.

I'm not sure I understand or agree with what Louie is trying to say with the “you don't possess life” line, but I have something else that puts me on his side, which is the knowledge you can always find something to live for, and the world is always bigger than it seems. The right mentality can remind you how big the world actually is, and how free you can be to explore it. You can come back from being fired from a shitty job, and your temporary failures do not define you. I know that seems unrelated from the situation in the show, but were I one of the people in this conversation now, I'd be Louie. I'd be upset that Eddie couldn't see the forest for the trees. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective ...

8. Depression Grumps: How Two Complete Jackasses Saved ... Thanksgiving, Maybe?

The Game Grumps have mentioned on their show before that people who watch it say it helps counteract their depression. While I just see it as something easy to watch and have on in the background while I play a game in a different tab, it's great that people can be affected that way. Then, one of the episodes they posted helped me out in a similar way.

I don't know that I was depressed when I saw it, but … well, you've read the last 7 items. Or not. TL;DR version: I had a rough year. Anyway, the latter half of the Grump duo, Danny, described his triumph over OCD in one episode of their Wind Waker HD play-through, titled “Fresh Air.” I was of course still in the middle of dealing with my heightened anxiety when this episode was posted, so I felt a weight lifted off when someone I was a fan of described their own struggles with detrimental mentality. It honestly felt like a breath of fresh air watching this comparably somber episode that broke up their usual antics, so the episode's title was certainly appropriate.

It's like Zen Buddhism in the form of two retards eating Skittles

It's weird how something as basic and seemingly pointless as a show that is literally two guys talking over a video game can have such a profound effect. Granted, I am glad not every episode of theirs is like this. Their story of how the game “butt ball” came to be is therapeutic in its own hilarious right.

A different kind of Zen ... 

Still, just hearing someone else say they have similar struggles to your own can really make a difference, even if it's coming from an incredibly pointless-seeming show. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective ...

9. FreeTetris: The Anti-Christ of Productivity

There's not much to say about this, except that I played a shit ton of Tetris this year when I wanted to put work off. It's pretty much my Solitaire. Here's proof:

 

Level: 52, Score: 759,085, Lines: 420, Life Skills Acquired: Packing Skills, Maybe?

I still haven't decided whether it keeps me productive by maintaining my sanity when I'm done with it or if I have a legitimate addiction. I'll say the former. It makes me feel better that way. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

10. SourceFedNerd Table Talks

Haven't actually seen this one myself yet

Another thing I don't have much to say about, but helped keep me sane is SourcefedNerd's Table Talks. I would laugh at these in my office, but try hard to contain myself, so that I didn't alert the DJs/other students to the fact I wasn't actually doing any work. It's just people talking, much like Game Grumps, but once again, small things can make a big difference. These videos really helped keep my sanity in check, because they usually gave me a good laugh or two. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

11. The Twerk that Ended Western Civilization

I reserve the right to remember shit that I'm not at all proud of remembering. When I was making this list, I realized I had left off the Boston bombing, and this was on here. Well, if I'm going to be honest, I hate to say, despite updating my blog when that bombing happened to tell anyone with family in Boston (I have a cousin living there as well) the newest emergency hotline reported from Kevin Smith's Twitter … which should be a sign I really need to watch who I get my facts from … the whole Miley Cyrus thing will probably stay in my brain longer. Look, it got way more press time, ok? The media would not let this shit go, and my memory tends to store things that have been repeated to me as opposed to stories that everyone talks about for three days straight, then just kind of forgets. At least, that was my experience when I was consuming news media this year.

Look at this filth, Becky. Can you believe children are exposed to this filth? Show that clip again, so the kids at home can see. 

Anyway, as Cracked pointed out today, none of what she did was anything new, and while I don't doubt she is also actually on crack, the decision to promote herself as “totally out of control” was probably made by sober executives, whether or not her image is her real self, and it's totally working.

Hell, I kind of like the song “We Can't Stop.” It's catchy. “Wrecking Ball” even starts out pretty decent with that quasi a capella thing she does, until she takes her clothes off and I get creeped out that her face is on Justin Bieber's body. In fact, I'd like to assert that this is exactly why I remember this better than the Boston bombing: Miley Cyrus's naked body is an atrocity far more difficult to un-see than real-life murder.

She certainly has a huge ball, I'll give her that

And then you have “23,” which makes me ashamed of my current age, because it's even associated with that abomination and direct affront to the righteous sensibilities of Our Lord Santa Christ. I haven't heard rap that boring since whatever other rap song was that boring I can't remember the name of.

I'm fine with her acting stupid, it's the terrible music I find immoral ... granted it is entertaining in a train wreck kind of way, or I wouldn't watch or post it

As far as all of this stuff goes though, I do not hate her near as much as many people claim to. I also think that Robin Thicke should hold some accountability for the VMA performance, but honestly, I just don't find it that shocking (re: aforementioned Cracked article). She's acting like a slut to get attention and it's working out perfectly for her. That says a lot more about the market she's in than in does about her, really. She doesn't actually have to be doing drugs and having sex, but if she does a bunch of off-the-wall videos and interviews about how she's doing those things, everybody suddenly pretends to be offended, yet pays more attention to her. Oh well. I guess some people think we'll go back to when Elvis not being able to shake his hips instead of further and further in the opposite direction. You can put down your picket signs, it ain't happening. The future has a lot of slutty, naked pop stars in it, and in my opinion, that's more the fault of the audience than the artist, really. If you think the U.S. or any other country is actually outraged by this crap, you're deluded. I choose to admit that I find it kind of amusing. I get that you might not. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

12. I Live for the Golf Claps, Golf Claps, Golf Claps

In my opinion, where last year's pop music was tremendously better than usual, thanks to the rise in popularity of alternative artists like fun. and Gotye, this year was particularly shitty for the genre, and radio in general. Most of that was because everything just sounded dull to me. That's why Lady Gaga's actually exciting-sounding “Applause” was, well, exciting.

There's not much to say about it, really. I honestly don't know what the lyrics mean exactly, aside from her liking attention, if they mean anything at all. I'm just glad she was there to sound like something other than a dead fish and have some goddamned energy in her pop song. I mean, I was basically taking fucking quaaludes this year, and I couldn't stand the drone of most pop music getting released in it. Was everyone else who listened to pop this year that high? Cause I'm not about to pick up smoking again just so I can enjoy the boring crap that made up most of the rest of this year's popular music. And fuck AVICII too. “Wake Me Up!” was catchy at first, but then I realized it was just a sample to be used in a Six Flags commercial, not a fucking song. I guess other people took way more quaaludes than I did though, cause in their reality, that other generic bull is apparently acceptable. Apparently, Gaga has lost a lot of attention by going the route of actually sounding like an entertainer. Here's Lady Gaga's head on a swan to lighten the mood:

 

What the fuck is a coonce? Is that a euphemism for vagina? Cause it sounds like a euphemism for vagina

She also had a decent sexy time song with “Do What You Want With My Body.” Featuring R. Kelly … I guess he heard Macklemore reference him and figured this was his comeback year? That was an odd choice. The resulting Twitter feed about it was funny, though. Anywhoo, music is about the most subjective thing one can discuss, but if your interpretation of reality includes thinking that Lorde's “Royals” doesn't get incredibly old quick, your interpretation is wrong and I hate you.

I mean, yeah this song features a man who peed on a 16 year old girl, but being boring and on my radio is a far worse crime that affects me directly

Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

13. I Genuinely Wish Poverty on Lorde

I couldn't escape this fucking thing. Even the alternative radio station I run plays it far too often, and I really need to delete it by next semester. It was catchy at first, and its anti-consumerist lyrics are good, but holy Christ, get it out of my head! It's so boring, yet so catchy, it just makes my entire world gray, cause it sticks its talons of boredom deep in my brain and will not let go. Kill it! Kill it with fire!

Y'know, watching it again after not having to for a while, it's actually not that bad ... not gonna rewrite these paragraphs, though

Look, obviously Lorde is talented and offering something different, but that something different just sounds a little bit too much like a dying, mumbling fish trying to tell me how it views consumerism in hip-hop culture. It's cool at first, because it's a talking fish with a pertinent message, but then this fish just talks about the same subject, in the same borderline-monotone voice, day after day, and it starts driving me crazy. Then I realize that what the fish is saying is in no way novel to begin with (Macklemore said basically the same thing, and his song didn't sound like death), and I just flush the fish down the toilet, because anything that repetitive and bland deserves to die. Unfortunately for me, neither Lorde nor radio stations are fish.

If you like it, more power to you, but the fact this is pretty much this year's “Somebody That I Used To Know” in terms of style and consistency of air play really drives home just how much better last year was as opposed to this year for music, in my opinion. But of course, you could feel the exact opposite of what I do. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

14. For Me, A Late Bloomer, “Love Like 17 Now” Just Means … Oh. Ew.

Ok, so not everything I heard this year was complete shit. As a matter of fact, I felt more proud to be running an alternative radio station, despite the fact we wound up also playing what became shitty pop songs, because we were also able to play things that were a bit more heartfelt and inspiring.

Granted, I don't really listen to the lyrics in “Crime 17,” so I have no idea what it's about, other than sounding romantic, but it has a quality to it that sounds a lot like bands from my youth, which is obviously a good thing from my perspective. It's polished, and we at least gave it a decent amount of “spins,” but to me it just sounds more emotional than the other music I heard this year, as music should be. I think this band might be one of those I don't realize is labeled emo. I'm still not totally clear on what that word means exactly, but if this is it, good. I like more emotion in my music.

Granted, I guess these guys give some merit to that newer South Park episode that focused on emos and goths this year, despite hipsters being way more relevant

Of course, there's a whole generation that is going to grow up with songs like “Royals” from Lorde and “23” from Miley Cyrus, and have those be their nostalgic benchmarks for good music. I can only promise to attempt not to try to kill these people. But hey, they're entitled to their incorrect perspective. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

I'll grant you older peeps you think the exact same thing about my nostalgic music, but the line "nobody likes you when you're 23" is very true; not even Jesus, apparently

15. Hungry Howie's Heaving Hate Food

I think the overwhelming lack of quality music this year (that I heard) stressed me out to the point of painful vomiting, stomach aches, and near-eternal diarrhea. Or maybe it was that old ground beef I cooked right before taking my Thanksgiving trip, which I did partly to see if I could make myself sick enough to skip the semester. But no. It was neither of those things. The meat was stored and cooked properly, and I mostly avoided music when I wasn't at the radio station. The culprit, as I have scientifically proven by eating it again the week after Thanksgiving and getting sick the next morning, was a pepperoni and mushroom pizza in Nacogdoches, TX.

Fuck you, kid ... so hard

Well, it might specifically be an allergy to mushrooms, but still, fuck that pizza. My stomach hurt like hell after the third Immodium. I will always remember this year as the one in which the doctor asked me to shit into a coffee filter at home, put my stool samples in little liquid bottles, then put those bottles in a bag that I handed my friend to drop off at the doctor's, because I was not going the fuck outside that day.

Take a good, hard look, kids. This is what hell looks like. 

Of course, while all this was unnecessary pain added on top of everything else, which caused me to have to literally write all 15 pages of a graduate-level research paper in a night (I made an A on it, by the way; pretty sure my professor threw a bone my way, though, that shit was not well-focused), it also led to further improving my confidence when I realized I could keep going no matter how many times life kicked me square in the dick. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

16. Lex Luthor: Congressman Extraordinaire

Remember that scene in Horrible Bosses/Glengaryy, Glenn Ross/Swimming with Sharks when ...?

I'm on episode 8 of the first season of House of Cards now. In this show, Kevin Spacey really shows his range, totally going outside the box of his usual roles to play a slimy, powerful asshole in a business suit. Specifically, he plays the detestable Frank Underwood, a Democratic Congressman that has influence over many people, who he gets to do his bidding, no matter who it hurts.

So far, I am not seeing any evidence he is doing what the show's tag line suggests. I do not see him being “bad, for the greater good,” I see him being Satan's little helper in an attempt to get himself higher up the ladder. Maybe there will be a big reveal at the end of the season regarding his true motivations for his actions, but I tend to doubt it.

While his character is despicable, and the supporting cast around him are not exactly monks themselves, this is perhaps what makes the show so addictive. These people are all clearly playing a game, and watching them make their moves is engaging so far. I'll see how the season ends, but I'm digging it.

Bing Images: Not a fan of Doug Stamper (Right)

I suppose you could view Frank Underwood's aggressive nature as a positive trait, even if he does seem to be motivated by ill-intent. He has been on what I consider the right side of an issue in the show a few times, so maybe his tactics are justified. I guess that depends largely on how one feels about the outcomes of his actions. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

17. And Now, We Will Sing a Hymn of Love and/or Peace, by I-Ron Butterfree

I caught Trigun on Netflix as well, towards the end of my semester. Holy Christ does this series have cheap animation in a lot of places, and the first half of the series is damn repetitive. I get it, the goofball known as “Vash the Stampede” is really just a clumsy guy who gets shot at wherever he goes, leaving destruction in his wake by accident. It's a funny premise, but it gets old. I could do without the overlong monologues, too.

Luckily, it does get better as it goes along and more is revealed about Vash's past, and the gaps in the story start being filled in. What I love most about Trigun, though, is not its story, it's the main character's philosophy.

It's a sexy, sexy message

Vash is fundamentally opposed to killing and suicide, only has a gun for defense, and promotes love and peace while trying to avoid conflict, despite being a force to be reckoned with in a shootout. He deals with a shitty past by smiling as much as he can, rather than brooding about it, which is such a nice trait to have after the Batmanization of most heroes I've seen recently.

Hell, even this guy has a light side to him. Take notes, Hollywood: Three Dimensional. THREE.

It might have a hell of a lot of flaws, but its main character and his philosophy on life alone, as well as his charm, are an inspiration for me. I haven't said this about a hero in media for a long time, but the world would be far better off with more Vash the Stampedes in it … assuming they didn't all have psychics trying to murder them all the time, since that tends to cause property damage. I don't know that I'm anything like Vash, really, but if I define myself as a charming, strong guy who can actively prevent unnecessary conflicts, I just might become that guy. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective ...

18. Sinterklaas: The Megyn Kelly Story

Oh man, this shit was great. “Kids, Santa just is white. [And so is Jesus.]” That's hilariously misinformed. I mean, the Santa thing I actually kind of get, because while Saint Nicholas of Myra, Greece (modern-day Turkey) probably didn't look anywhere near as pale as the one in a red suit, serving Coco-Cola to polar bears in modern advertising, I can sympathize with seeing Santa as being a white man, what with the barrage of images of White Santa every Christmas. But are we still trying to say Jesus was a white man? Really? We've been through this.

The sad thing is, crap like this can actually work on people who never change the channel

The cherry on top of the Daily Show gold was that tone-deaf back peddle where she tried to say it was a joke. The idiocy of the “War on Christmas” really shone through here, and it was hilarious. Look, Santa Claus is a fictional character. Instead of getting upset at people for trying to just make him whatever they want, realize that it's the equivalent of asking the creators of How to Train Your Dragon to be a bit more historically accurate with their depiction of dragons. They're both fictional characters. If you want to live in a world where Santa's white, you can totally do that by just telling yourself he's a white guy. Just don't force it on others. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

19. Duck Dynasty: Dickwolves of Nature

Sadly, this one was a bit less entertaining and more frustrating, and I really wish my Facebook feed hadn't etched this bullshit into my brain this year, but it did.

Now this is a viewpoint I can rally behind ... even though I have not seen that movie in years

All I have to say is, to A&E: what the fuck did you expect a duck hunter with a ZZ Top beard living in Louisiana to say? I get that that's prejudicial of me, and not everyone like him is homophobic, but come on. Don't act shocked. You know who you're paying. To the people claiming his suspension sets a precedent for limiting the Freedom of Speech rights among conservatives, that law prevents the government from throwing you in jail, not from your employer taking action to pursue action against you for something it felt was out of line with its values. If you want to argue he was merely practicing his religion, I'd argue that what he said is a bit beyond going to church and praying, but feel free to debate that. Point is, this news story involved nothing revolutionary, and was not worth starting a revolution over, like my Facebook feed seemed to think it was. Everyone calm down, cause if you start thinking things like this are worth revolting over, one just might happen, and it will be wasted on something incredibly stupid. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

20. Duolingo: Learn French, So Chicks Will Duolingo You

I learned about this app and website from the Phillip DeFranco show. I took Spanish in high school, but couldn't retain enough of it to land a job as a teller in a Spanish-speaking part of town, so I'm trying to get my skills back up. I've been more focused on French though, because more girls find that one sexy. Oh yeah.

Hola! Yo como mucho pene ... pasta

Anyway, since I'm majoring in Mass Communications for my Master's degree, I figure I may as well be able to communicate with a few more masses. I used to categorize other languages under classes like “math” and “art” as “things I can be competent, but never excellent at.” I no longer have this problem of defining myself as a failure because of temporary struggles. I really do believe I can do anything I put my mind to, and that's precisely why I'm able to, and will improve my linguistic skills. Most importantly, for free. How you define yourself is a huge factor in who you become. I've decided to be an unstoppable intellectual and physical force, constantly improving. I'm so glad there are free programs like this to help with that. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

21. Catching Fire: The Movie: The Last Thing On My List That's Not A Game, But A Hunger Game!

I thought the book was so-so, but the movie was possibly my most anticipated of the year. It did a good job of adapting the book, but it actually improved on it in places by allowing you to see the main character having to rely on tone and inflection for hints, and having the menace of others surrounding her presented visually made it easier to sympathize with some of her dumber choices. In the book, I read her internal monologue, saw every twist coming a mile away, and thought, “you stupid witch, are you seriously not picking up on all these hints you keep dropping yourself?” In the movie, nothing was spelled out in black and white the way the book's narrative was arguably forced to, because while both are definitely from Katniss' perspective, the movie does a better job of illustrating hints through looks given by the characters, among other things that can be easily misinterpreted in real-life situations. In my opinion, visual media is far better at creating confusion and empathy for confused characters than books, because it forces you to try and figure things out without any internal monologues or third person descriptions of events, character emotions, or thoughts that help you be unfairly able to critically analyze what's going on over a long period of time; a luxury not always available to the characters in the book.

You gotta admit, this movie had damn good trailers

Basically, I think the movie did a good job of downplaying the dramatic irony I experienced in the book. Granted, it also made certain scenes a bit less dark, some plot points didn't have the appropriate build-up due to the cutting of subplots, and I wasn't always exactly moved by the acting, so it had its problems too. But a change in medium for a narrative can profoundly affect how an audience perceives its story, even if the basic elements are mostly the same for both the original and the adaptation of a work. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

22. Batman: Arkham Asylum GOTY Edition: So Close To Being Gotye Edition

Hey, look! A video game on a blog of mine. And I'm talking about actually playing it. It's a Christmas fucking miracle!

No lozenges were harmed in the making of this game, because Kevin Conroy is a badass

In all seriousness, this was the first game I bought off Steam, and while the graphics already look a bit dated, I was loving being able to close in on Joker's face as we went deeper into the asylum during the introduction to the game. I loved being able to look at Joker's creepy smile from Batman's perspective, as he threatened me. Of course, I got to choose where I looked, and I chose directly into the eyes of the Joker. That's something unique to video games: getting to choose the perspective from which you and your character experience the story. Don't tell me choose-your-own adventure books let you do that too, it's not the same thing.

That's intense ... 

Anyway, the motto of this blog is especially true for the world of video games. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective...

23. Fez

And of course the motto is true for video games, because it comes from one. That's right, while I only have the first level or so of the game completed so far, the game has already had an effect on me. Once again, a simple message has inspired me this year, and the way that message, given by one of the game's NPCs, was illustrated by the game play pretty much inspired the theme that ties together the 23 items in this blog. “Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective” is driven home in a magical way when you first see the flat world of Fez spin into a three-dimensional one. Despite its simple graphical style, I was more in awe of its opening cut-scene than anything in Arkham Asylum I've seen so far.

Guy with cane at 1:08 says the quote seen throughout this blog, 1:30 is where the magic starts

That's what this year has been all about for me. Changing my perspective so that I could learn to open up my own world to greater possibilities. I learned that defining myself as being stuck is a huge part of what makes me that way. I choose to be more like Vash the Stampede, seeking love and peace wherever I go, and keep going no matter what. The way this year has dragged me through the mud has proven to me I can do it, and something about the opening to Fez really summed all of this up for me perfectly, with very few words.

I know he said stupid shit on Twitter or something, but I can't be mad at that face

Of course, having seen its developer, Phil Fish getting his very own series of kicks in the nut sack of his ego while making this game when I watched Indie Game: The Movie have also driven this inspiration home for me. I'm glad he kept going and finally finished, just like I've finally finished this blog after delaying it. Reality is perspective, and perspective is subjective …

 

Merry Christmas, everybody!

 I got a PC/360 controller for my Steam games from my brother, plus a 5-in-1 flashlight thing and my dad's old car radio from him, plus $300 total from my parents and aunts and uncles, and assorted stocking stuffers like Twizzlers, gum, and such. We just had dinner (delicious and why I went into a food coma, causing even further blog delay) and opened presents pretty much. 

What did you all do/get? 

Pictured Above: Me on Christmas 1997, receiving N64 and Star Fox 64