WARNING! Serious weirdness follows. What do you expect from the dream world?
I dreamt I was going to Richard Garriott’s [Lord British] estate. On the perimeter were these interrogation machines shaped like giant cubes with robot arms. They were scary, but I got past them with only a few pokes and gropes.
Inside the palatial mansion was a toy shop with every type of toy. I passed an operating electric train set and shelves full of stuffed animals and board game boxes. Then I met Lord British [LB] and he was fencing with his 20-something year-old son. He gives an order to someone to give me a gift and I’m given a toy machine gun with a microphone attachment. Lord British’s wife appears and mentions something about a speaker for it, so I left and found it in the toy shop.
I returned to the sparing room and LB was about to change his son’s voice for a LARP (or lark?). LB said something with an Orcish accent and then his son was supposed to blow on a flute-like instrument to change his voice. Only his son said he didn’t want to be Orc, so LB said something with a Troll accent. His son blew a note and he started speaking with a Troll accent. Then it was my turn, only I couldn’t blow the note properly and LB kept squeezing my lips rather hard to get me to do it right. He was kind of an arrogant jerk most of the time. Finally I got it right, and then I was supposed to take a shower and change clothes.
In the shower, I got into a Trollish argument with LB’s son. The Troll role-playing was getting serious and we became unreasonably argumentative. We never did get dressed again and ran around the toy shop and all over the estate (which had its own lake) playing at being Trolls.
Eventually we were sitting inside a cave entrance made of concrete (LB’s estate was set up like a D&D Theme Park I think). Traps, like mouse traps, appeared on the floor and we compulsively tripped them to see what would happen. Out of them appeared black squirming creatures which crawled out of the cave and into the lake. Then I realized LB’s plan to have us seed the estate with evil creatures so he could then heroically save everyone.
I jumped into the water and swam around and then get out. I saw Patrick Warburton standing there naked and with a chest full of muscles surrounded by fawning females. He smiled at me and I ran from him towards the mansion where there was a large crowd of sightseers. I am still naked and now suddenly aware of it (maybe the Trollness wore off?). I covered the important parts with my hands and ran through the crowd, into the mansion and through the toy shop looking for clothes. All I found were tiny clothes for action figures and then I woke up.
Analysis: There is so many things I see in this culled from my daily life that I don’t think I can go into it all, but I’ll try.
Richard Garriott: I recently researched all the Ultima games and read a little bit about Garriot and watched the documentary of his trip to the International Space Station. His jerkiness here is probably because I’ve combined him with John Dupont, who I saw in a documentary recently.
Interrogation cubes: Maybe it was thinking about the parts that disturbed me in Wolfenstein: New Order. I won’t spoil it.
Train Set: Always loved train sets. I think about them a lot around Christmas probably because my Dad got me trains for Xmas one year.
Fencing: I recently watched the movie Don Quixote [2000], staring John Lithgow (Quixote) and Bob Hoskins (Sancho Panza). There was a fencing scene between James Purefoy (Sanson Carrasco) and a pupil.
Toy Shop: Recently went to Toys R Us I guess. Wouldn’t Richard Garriott have a house fun of toys? Of course he would (he actually has a house full of medieval paraphernalia).
Toy Machine Gun: I had the distinct impression in the dream that LB had mistaken my interest in games as being all about shooters. I’ve played a lot of them, but my heart is in RPGs.
Microphone: A favorite “toy” of mine in high school was a tape recorder with mics that my friend Sean and I used to “play” with. We’d record skits and random dialog all the time.
Orc and Troll Speak: This is what happens when you read too much Dragon Magazine articles on the ecology of fantasy monsters.
Patrick Warburton: I’m just a fanboy of him. He was the live action Tick, the voice of Samson in Venture Bros., and has done voice work for numerous video games, including the main villain in the recent Tales from Borderlands.
Nakedness: Saved it for last. That fact alone would make Freud say it was the most important part. Well, it’s a common anxiety. I don’t know what else to say about that.
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