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My god, New Kid, what a tragic backstory!

South Park: The Stick of Truth triumphed over adversity to become a critical and commercial success. It was a gamble on a franchise that had never had a great game, went through a protracted development cycle, and survived the closing of its original publisher. Three years later South Park: The Fractured but Whole may not have had as many roadblocks, but it is a sequel to a surprise hit being developed by a different team and attempting to be just as successful as its predecessor. While it may not reach the heights that The Stick of Truth hit, this is a worthy sequel.

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The other great way to park.

Oh, the rush of zipping around another car, missing its bumper by a tiny smidge, and slamming on the brakes as you pull into the perfect parallel spot before oncoming traffic T-bones you into oblivion! This is the heart-revving, nerve-rattling, airbag-exploding life of a Parking Star: a fantastical existence we can all now get a taste of thanks to Parking Star 3D! Alright, I can’t hide the fact that parking cars is lame, but thanks to my low expectations, after playing Parking Star 3D I almost feel like parking is really exciting.

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Prepare to be offended.

In the seventeen years that South Park has graced the airwaves, fans have been subjected to the horror and torment of a wide assortment of video games that were palatable at best and flat out blasphemous at their worst. They lacked everything that makes South Park fans tingle with excitement: gratuitous amounts of foul language, over-the-top violence, crazy characters, blatant insults veiled behind a mask of satire, and the raw unapologetic use of every conceivable taboo with the intention to offend.  But years later it seems that our cries of injustice were finally heard. Here it finally is, the definitive South Park experience chock full of enough smut, vulgarity, and sexism, to satisfy the sick twisted bastards that we all are.

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