PixlBit

The Wii?! What the... oh phew. Yea, the PS2 controller ain't bad.

I remember getting this with my Xbox and wondering just who Microsoft thought were going to play with this. Clearly it wasn't a human... which revives my thought that Microsoft was secretly designing a controller for their alien friends on Serpo. You know, the ones with giant frog hands.

That Jag controller is hilarious! Just look at that monstrosity! I might use it as a cutting board for cheese, but as a controler? No way!

The Dreamcast controller?! What the...my...oh...geeze... are you kidding me?! That big goofy thing with the EMU holder in the middle?! The only controller more awkward than that was the "Duke" Xbox controller which was clearly designed for a Sasquatch.

If Xbox One came with Men's Room Mayhem installed on the hard drive, then I'd buy it.

Yea, maybe I'll get an iPad instead and load up Steam on it. Now that's a system.

Ooo wow! That would be great! There's nothing like a gorgeous RPG to pull me into buying a console.

I look at the front page and may even read what's there while I'm waiting at Starbucks on my way to gaming with a friend every weekend. I'm pretty sure that doesn't count as "reading the paper", but I've heard that some people do. Who they are. I have no idea.

Every weekend now I think about just leaving it all behind, but then I come to my senses and dash to my friend's place to play games all day. Am I to old to do this at 45? According to my peers, yes. But reading the NYTimes while smoking a pipe and petting my Corsican Mastiff just doesn't appeal to me the way Shadow Wars, Enchanted Arms or Etrian Odyssey do. 

It's all about the money as we all know. I'm already feeling alienated by the whole thing. I guess I'll go back to my niche gamerdom and play my JRPGs on PS2. Sob.